A Quick Rant While He's Away

I am not exactly proud to say that for most of my working life I have been in the field of Customer Service, and in my time I have dealt with what I'd imagine to be every possible permutation of the upset customer. But no permutation perplexes me more than people who are upset by a continual situation that never changes.

The other night I had a guest ('Guest' is the euphemism for 'Customer' at the movie theater where I work, a place laden with euphemisms aplenty, but that's a rant for a different day.) who was upset with the lines at concessions. He asked to speak to a manager and they sent me, up until recently a Qual Coordinator, but now just a Coordinator, which is really just a euphemism for 'Supervisor'.

He was visibly upset and lashed out at me with something along the lines of, "Every time I come here it's the same damn thing. And now I am late to my movie because of YOU."

After I apologized and explained that we have reduced staff and that the problem wasn't likely to get better any time soon, he wandered off, swearing loudly and dropping popcorn carelessly from his overfilled tub.

Every time he goes to the movies at the Dream Factory, the lines at concessions are so long he always misses the beginning of his movie.

Every time.

If you've found yourself complaining to someone in customer service about something similar, I have to ask you this simple question:

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!?!?

If you go somewhere, and every time your experience is unsatisfactory, then why the fuck do you keep going there?

Now I can kinda understand why you would subject yourself to something like that at say, the DMV, a place where we sometimes have to go, and there are no alternatives. And I can kinda understand why you would complain about the conditions at such a place.

But only kinda.

Complaining about long lines at the DMV is a bit akin to the asshole who is always late and says something like, "There was traffic."

Oh, really? There was traffic? In LA? Surely you jest.

See, there are just some times in our lives where we have to anticipate unpleasantness and adjust our actions accordingly. If you have to go to the DMV, make sure you allot yourself enough time to wait in the lines, if you have to be someplace in LA, make sure you plan plenty of extra time to deal with potential (and probable) traffic. And if you go to a movie theater and there are ALWAYS long lines at the concession stand, make sure you plan plenty of time to arrive, get your tickets (if you live in the Stone Age and haven't figured out how to buy your tickets online) and wait in the lines that are ALWAYS there.

Or better yet, find another fucking movie theater to go to!

What kind of mother fucking masochistic asshole would subject themselves to a situation that never, ever (by his own account), changes?

When I managed a small video store, it was awesome when people used to say things like that to me. I would calmly apologize, and then give them directions to the Blockbuster up the street. "If you have a bad experience every time you come here, let me invite you to never make that same mistake again."

Asshole.